← Back to Chuck Norris A Day

Archive

Every joke we've ever sent, browsable by day.

August 15, 2026
Chuck Norris scratches his nuts with a cheese grater.
August 14, 2026
CHUCK NORRIS COULD BEAT UP WILL MCCULLOUGH WITH IIF HE WAS HELLEN KELLER.
August 13, 2026
Chuck Norris recently bagged a Grizzley Bear with a Nerf gun.
August 12, 2026
Chuck Norris puts Baby in the corner.
August 11, 2026
When Chuck Norris was 8 years old, he raped a pedophile
August 10, 2026
If at first you do not succeed.......you are not Chuck Norris
August 9, 2026
Chuck Norris can tear a page out of face book
August 8, 2026
Chuck Norris`s calender doesn`t need a leap year. Its more acurate than ours.
August 7, 2026
Chuck Norris has a distended scrotum due solely to the size of his three testicles.
August 6, 2026
The head of Chuck Norris' penis has knuckles.
August 5, 2026
The only reason Texas Rangers carry a loaded Colt 45 on their hip is because Chuck Norris weighs too much.
August 4, 2026
Chuck Norris helps out NASA by throwing astronauts into space.
August 3, 2026
Chuck Norris likes to force-feed Navy SEALs fish.
August 2, 2026
You can lead a horse to water, but Chuck Norris can make him eat Tequila jello shots.
August 1, 2026
Chuck Norris can fly submerines
July 31, 2026
Chuck Norris broke the speed of sound. With his elbow.
July 30, 2026
Chuck Norris is the first man to have sex on every continent. He achieved this distinction over a period of 2 days in 1967.
July 29, 2026
Chuck Norris doesn't bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing.
July 28, 2026
Death once visited Chuck Norris,CHuck Norris said"DON'T EVER TELL CHUCK NORRIS WHEN HE DIES,I TELL YOU WHEN YOU DIE."Then Chuck delievered the most powerful roundhouse kick ever and even Death knew he did something wrong as he declined into hell.
July 27, 2026
Chuck Norris is the answer to the question, "What's the worst thing that could happen?"
this space intentionally left awkward